This year just started like every other year in US. Guess what… got a ticket on January 1st; yes it’s my routine for last 4 years in US. First year I am so pissed…Second year I felt bad, third year made me take it easy, this year I am laughing and policemen thought I was drunk but there’s no alcohol testing or so. Yes, I am laughing crazy thinking of getting ticket for every New Year; is this how I am supposed to start New Year which tells me go ahead carefully, watch your back and control your speed.
What else…Still screening movies, learning instrument, going to gym on and off…, nothing much changed other than we stopped playing cards and not into casinos anymore.., but on the other end I am serious about something..I don’t know what it’s about. I am still searching to do something more …,( still searching..I will come back with…)
U-Turn/Life-Turn…
Woooow, I never thought this will happen so quick and easy….I always think this is a U-turn to life where you make your choice with lots of thinking. But, there is always dilemma filled whether, our thinking ability or knowledge is sufficient to take such big decisions.
“No sensible decision can be made any longer without taking into account not only the world as it is, but the world as it will be. . .”- Isaac Asimov
It’s all started six month before the day comes, Mom asked me whether I am looking for myself or they have a choice to choose their daughter-in-law. The answer is straight and simple. Before I tell them my priorities, I started to look over myself to find someone to match me. Who would match with arrogant, proud, rude person like me…., no I am not really that bad but my perfectionism makes me look like that…., I really didn’t find a perfect answer for this but I decided to have a what I really like. Putting all together she should be above 5’.6” in height, who has smiley face with beautiful soul filled with simplicity than sumptuousness. So, it’s not hard for me to make my choice because I know what I really want.
I know, in any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing. It’s easy for me to say yes or no looking at some ones profile but it’s hard on my parents to catch up with my requirement. Probably Kranthi’s profile is in first few we are interested in, where her parents decided not to get her married with a person in foreign countries. A month before my wedding, One day Mr.Sheetal called me asking for my profile. Sheetal and Divya were my college mates and a beautiful couple who lives in Washington; they fell in love during our college days and went into wedlock an year before. Kranthi being relative to Divya, Sheetal has word on me to Kranthi’s Family.
My parents were really interested in Kranthi’s profile right from the begging not only because her family is well-off or renowned family for their simplicity and hard-working in the our state but the result in astrology between Kranthi and me came up in flying colors which makes my dad go happy because this is his highest priority. I should also mention Venkateswara Rao garu, a school director and far cousin to my father. He is on the other end moving the match and played a very keen role in the event.
Mediators are playing key role in conversations. I and my B.I.L went to India on 25th of August, only reason behind the trip is to see Kranthi and come to decision. We had a call from Venkateswara Rao garu on 26th saying that – “Gopal Krishna Garu (Kranthi’s Dad) and his well wishers , total six in number will be coming to your house tomorrow to have a chat with Naren.” The number get to keep added and finally there were nine members in the screening committee. I am bit embarrassed with the situation, this is where I came to know how any Indian bride would feel in our routine formality of being shown bride to groom( Pellichupulu), but I am bit dare enough to face it. We had a normal conversation and finally Gopal Krishna Garu Invited my family to their house.
Me being embarrassed with the situation, I thought Kranthi would feel more discomfort, I asked my mom not involve anyone other than dad. After usual family conversation I accepted to take my sister and B.I.L with me. On 1st of September 2009, we went to Supriya’s parents House in Rajmundry. Where Supriya is Kranthi’s Sister-in-Law, Wife to Kranthi’s only brother Ravi. By the time I entered the venue the ambiance is completely different to my expectation. I made it so simple from my end so, Kranthi wouldn’t feel any discomfort. On the other end the arrangements were almost like an engagement. It’s typical Indian Pellichupulu…stay tuned for more…
First Looks…
The arrangements are really great but, to me they are awful. I didn’t expect it like that, what I have in mind is pretty simple and very less head count. I really started scolding the whole Indian marriage system where you get to meet and talk to women before her parents and relatives. When I came to know they all are Kranthi’s close relatives none other than her aunts and uncles, I answered myself if she’s comfort with that why can’t me. Later, I came to know that they even don’t know all that but Supriya’s dad made all the arrangements thinking everything will go well- which means we will like each other and accept for wedlock. Coming back to me, I walked in with family; we men got offered to sit in living room where mom and sis escorted towards bedroom. Everything looks fine other than some tension in me. I am just covering it with a smile on my face, where I get introduced to all the relatives of Kranthi, Welcome drinks, snacks which I really didn’t care for, all I am trying to do is figure out what next, where’s the main course of the event- Pellichupulu.
There comes Kranthi, tall, fair and confused. She looks more confused than anything to me at that time- what do you expect anyway. They made her sit in a chair where she is not out of my focus. Man, you should definitely capture this- me feeling shy, she is blushing and everyone looking at us, trying to read our facial expression, what a hell it is. I don’t think she even saw me but I got myself a clean picture of her.
First Word… “Just feel free, if you don’t I can’t feel so.”
They let Kranthi go finally and after few minutes they asked me to walk in so, we can have some private chat. What’s private when all those people around and my sister and Kranthi’s sisters were sitting with us? To me this is just a formality created by new generation parents to look little bold, which look like they had given us a choice, where you can see we don’t have any chance at this point. It’s halfway decided before you go there. – Whatever… (This is my inner voice). Though you know all this is pretty annoying my mind started to roam around what to talk, how I should start, should I ask about her or should I tell her about me. We sat there for ten to fifteen minutes without any sound where my sister, Supriya and Kranthi’s cousin making up conversation so that we would join them. But, man, Kranthi didn’t even make a word, In between everyone left and it’s just me and her.
Yes, this is what private chat mean to me. I thought, women are usually shy, we should make a move. I gathered little braveness and said – “Just feel free, if you don’t I can’t feel so.” Kranthi still makes me fun with this sentence. I asked whether she know anything about me, she nodded as if she knew a bit but her eyes seems like she is interested in listening. I started to say what I am, “I work 8 hours a day come home go to gym learn guitar which I started newly, I screen movies on weekend, when I don’t have movies I just go shopping and roam around- This is it and this is What Naren do, Any questions?” In reply, she said, she came back from Hyderabad and looking over school but not much of a particular daily routine-she said.
First Gift – “Iphone- call me; my number is the only one in contacts list”
Finally we all had lunch, everything got settled, and in this Particular scene everyone is busy from their own end. From our (Kranthi and Me) end we were thinking so much like to know each other more, talk more and all that youth stuff. From elders point of view what next where to start when to start how to accommodate everything in ten days from pundits point of view they are busy in calculation and discussing themselves to find auspicious day for our engagement and wedding. The rest were busy at the arrangements over the lunch session.
I took a moment and called my sister and asked her to give phone to Kranthi, which is a gift from me to Kranthi if I feel like walking with her for rest of my life. My sis insisted me to give it to her… My F-I-L (Father-In-Law) being a great observer called Kranthi asked me to give it to her. With a little blush on my face I gave it to Kranthi an Iphone and said “call me; my number is the only one in contacts list.” Pundits got the dates finalized, August 6th as Engagement and August 14th for our wedding. We left the venue by greeting good bye to everyone. Couple hours after we reached my house I took some time and called Kranthi- where I got Kranthi’s number from my sister…that conversation never ended till date.
